WHITT'S END: 10.23.13

      Whether you're at the end of your coffee, your day, your week or even your rope, welcome to Whitt's End:

   *Told y'all to chill on the Cowboys' salary-cap panic. I know the rest of the NFL wants to think Jerry Jones is such a financially-handcuffed dufus that he won't be able to even field a team in 2014, but the way out of their perennial predicament is - once again - not all that complicated. I explain over at NBC 5's Blue Star Blog.

   *I'm intrigued by the World Series. Best two fandoms in baseball, right? I've been fortunate enough to watch games in both Fenway and Busch, and those folks don't just love their baseball. They know their baseball. They live their baseball. DFW is a baseball town, sure. But Boston and St. Louis are baseball neighborhoods, much more passionate and close-knit communities of one. When a big, positive play occurs at Rangers Ballpark, the fans' nights just got better. When it happens in Fenway or Busch, those fans' lives just got better. And, for what it's worth, I don't hate either team enough to invoke Failure Jesus.

   *So does former PGA Tour member-turned-Golf-Chanel-analyst Brandel Chamblee think Tiger Woods is a cheater? Or not? I'm a little confused. He gave Tiger's five-win season a score of "100", yet a grade of "F." Said he got a "little cavalier with the rules" and cited four incidents. But in the wake of creating the controversy, Chamblee both stood by his story and apologized to Woods. How can it be both?

   *As expected, Chris Arnold returned to 105.3 The Fan Monday after a week's suspension for plagiarism. We all make mistakes, but usually they're innocent errors. Not pre-meditated, calculated theft. We accidentally knock the lamp off the nightstand; We don't scheme to steal our neighbor's chandelier. As a writer in this market for 27 years I've been wrong on predictions or breaking news, but never have I blatantly just copy-and-pasted somebody else's work and sold it as my own. Chris' job has survived. But I don't see how his credibility does.

   *I know this is weird, but the best Cowboys' offensive lineman through seven games has been Doug Free. And their best defensive back? Orlando Scandrick. I'd have lost that bet back in August. You?

   *Okay, maybe there is hope for this country after all. Despite some protests from ninny parents who erect statues for the kids when they finish half their morning juice, the Keller Youth Association football league is discontinuing the embarrassing and dangerous act of participation trophies. "Life makes you earn everything you get," the group says, causing anyone who's ever been screwed over by life to stop what they're doing and give a standing ovation. (Stopping. Standing. Clapping.)

   *Hot.

   *Not.

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   *Happy Humpdaaaay White Truck Wednesday. Was stuck in traffic on 121 in the Mid-Cities yesterday for the 19th consecutive day, and got caught behind a big you-know-what-color construction dump truck. On the back of its bed read this sign: "NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR BROKEN WINDSHIELDS!" Says who? I mean, just because you underline a word and use all caps accented by an exclamation point doesn't absolve you of spraying rocks all over the highway. Otherwise, why don't bad guys with guns just bust down a door, shoot up a joint and then walk away free men while pointing to a T-shirt that reads "Not responsible for death"? Putting that sign on that truck isn't a pro-active safety move, it's a lame attempt to cover the company's ass in the wake of lots of complaints from drivers who have driven behind it before and, sure enough, had rocks fly off it and break their windshields. That sign might as well have read "F*k You."

   *As I've said before I think the NFL overdoes it with the pink-for-a-month breast cancer awareness initiative. And this story says that only 8 percent of the total proceeds from pink items actually make it to the cancer research level. But a couple thoughts: How can you possibly have too much cancer awareness? And, unless you've given more than 8 percent to the cause, you have no right to belittle the NFL's effort.

   *An example of how Fantasy Football negatively affects the NFL: There are actually fans debating and writers actually analyzing a trade that would send Adrian Peterson to the Cowboys. Happens in Fantasy leagues all the time. Happens in the NFL none of the time.

   *Been inundated by the hype (Nov. 5 I think it is) for the next Call of Duty. As a guy who stopped playing video games the day I conquered Mario Bros. back in the early '90s, I no longer have a desire to just pretend to do stuff. But I was thinking how different life would be growing up as a 9-year-old in 2013 compared to my habitat in 1973. Nowadays kids have NFL Sunday Ticket. Whereas - I swear this is true - I actually spent considerable time as a punk waiting for the rain to stop so I could go outside have a grassboat race against my friend. A what-the-what you say? A grassboat race. We each picked a big blade of St. Augustine grass as our "boat", then placed them in the gutter that ran along the curb of our street and let the swift-moving water propel them through the neighborhood. We'd monitor and chase and cheer on those suckers for hours, until one of them crossed the "finish line" of our neighborhood creek. Yeah, try that idea on your 9-year-old.

   *Today? Final day of training camp at Pizza Buzz. Couple of pre-season games Thursday and Friday, then this weekend we start keeping score and playing for keeps. Don't be a stranger.

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